Years ago there was a comedian whose catch phrase was “I’m so confused.” To be honest I know how he feels. Sunday morning I got up to go to church to cook breakfast at 6:30, I could have worn shorts if I wanted to. Then Monday morning I had to go to Florence, left around nine, thinking it was about the same, so I had on shorts, guess what, I like to froze to death! I’ve heard of “Global Warming” but this is getting ridiculous.
Didn’t winter start about the middle of December? I think it was cold for a few days, but even Christmas, really wasn’t Christmas this year, I mean it was a little chilly but nothing to brag about. Nowadays if we think about snow, we’re really thinking about late February maybe even the first of March. Wasn’t it last year or the year before we had snow the last weekend of February?
Now I’m not complaining, just explaining as my Daddy use to say. But it seems to me winter just lasts a couple weeks now, not like it did when we were young. Oh sure, it would stay warm till late September, but by the middle of October, there was a chill coming on, and by Thanksgiving it was cold. Christmas would roll around, and with it a chance, just a chance of snow. These days we’re lucky if we even have to wear a coat at Christmas.
Now like most of us, I’m not crazy about standing outside in 20 degree weather with the wind blowing up your pants leg, but it does seem like something’s out of whack. If it gets to seventy degrees in January, what’s July going to be like? I know those snowbirds are eating up this warm weather, playing golf and all, but when early August gets here and it’s too hot to breathe, is it worth it? Some days it’s too hot to fish, so what’s the use calling in sick, to sit in the house, I don’t think so.
It’s not like we can do anything about it anyway, but it does give us something to complain about. And let’s face it, we love doing that. Like “It’s so hot outside I had to use my inhaler to take the trash out”. Or “I got so much clothes on if I dropped a dollar I couldn’t bend over to pick it up.” And then there’s, “My wife’s feet are so cold, if a guy was having a heart attack, I’d just stick her feet to his back, that would jump start his heart, or kill him, one of the two.”
But this crazy weather is got to where it’s affecting things we use to take for granted, like how many people you know plant gardens now? I’m not talking about a couple tomato plants and a pepper plant, I’m talking about butter beans, cucumbers, corn, and stuff like that. Back when I was growing up everybody had a garden, now I don’t think I know anybody who does, though probably some still do. Every year Mr. Govane would come by with his mule and wagon and lay it back for Momma and Daddy, then in the afternoon they would be out there with a hoe, getting it ready. To be honest, I didn’t work in it too much, let’s just say that’s a column for another day. But I use to shell those butterbeans, and if I never do it again, I won’t miss it.
In fact one time we spent three days, from sun up till sun down shelling them, Me Momma, and Barbara Taylor, seems like it was four or five bushels, I swore if I ever had to do that again I’d never eat another one. Thank the Lord for the man who invented the bean sheller.
But it’s gotten too hot to do that now, besides who wants to blanch them anyway? You can just as easy pick up a frozen bag for a dollar or two anyway. And besides they taste the same, WRONG!! If you’ve never had fresh from the garden butterbeans, you’ve missed one of the wonders of the world, much less corn from the stalk to the pot. Squash fresh cut and quick fried in egg and flour, cucumbers. I better quit, I’m getting hungry, and before you know it somebody will mention okra, let’s don’t go there, this is a family newspaper.
And now it’s affecting winter. How many of you want to stand around a fire barrel in seventy-degree weather. We had one at the Bruce Boy’s Bar-B-Que, but we didn’t need it till the sun went down. It use to be we thought we were going to run out of wood, now we just burn it to have something to do, besides the grill is hot enough. You don’t want to be sweating on your hawg.
The only thing is, there isn’t anything we can do about it, but that don’t mean we can’t complain about it. I think it’s in our DNA or something.
You can reach Robbin by e-mail at robbinbruce@yahoo.com.
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